


Godly Good Sports

by Reremouse (TheBelfry)



Series: Ridiculous Avengers Things That Never Happened [2]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Baseball, Gen, It might be Steve's fault, It's probably Tony's fault, We'll blame Tony because we love him, asgardian baseball association
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-05
Updated: 2020-01-05
Packaged: 2021-02-27 12:47:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22127377
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBelfry/pseuds/Reremouse
Summary: Baseball comes to Asgard.  Really.
Relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark, but only if you squint - Relationship
Series: Ridiculous Avengers Things That Never Happened [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1592767
Comments: 3
Kudos: 18





	Godly Good Sports

**Author's Note:**

> We can safely assume that nothing listed as part of this series is at all serious, and is instead the kind of thing that runs through my head during long drives, slow lines, and time spent in waiting rooms without cell reception.

It all started with the idea that Thor would be the best Avenger to throw a CostCo bottle of benadryl down the Hulk’s throat during allergy season, when they’ve all absolutely had it with the Hulk-size sneezes, and Wasp, especially, has put her foot down on the matter. 

Steve throws out an aside that Thor would be really good at baseball. Tony’s not even a Baseball fan, but even he admits Thor would be REALLY GOOD AT IT. If he joined a team, World Series all the way. Tony considers buying a baseball team. 

Thor would probably like it so much he’d bring it home. If there’s a society that would love baseball as much as Americans and Japanese, it is the Asgardians. 

There would be some changes though. A longer bat, much thinner probably. Smaller ball. Bigger field. 

And the batter doesn’t drop the bat before he runs. 

In fact, everyone on the field has a bat at all times. The basemen don’t stand around waiting for the ball or all go running after it, they guard their bases, and the runners have to battle their way through to the bases before the guy with the ball gets there (because a ball isn’t much defense against a bat, let’s face it, and the Asgardians seem pretty fair in their game play). 

Thor’s team would be the team to beat for a while, but then Loki would field a team and Thor would start losing. 

Once he figures it out, there’s a new rule the next morning: no magic. 

Loki would be indignant, but Thor reasonably points out he brought the game, so it’s his game. Loki could have brought the game, but no, he was too busy trying to conquer manhattan. 

The next week, there’s another new rule: no knives on the field. 

The week after: no nails in the bats. 

And the week after that: bats must be made only of wood. 

Plus one more: Only species of wood native to Asgard and approved by the Asgardian Baseball Association, whose word on rules of the sport is final. 

Loki counters by founding the Asgardian Referee Association. 

Asgard spends the rest of its history too busy to start any more wars, and wars brought to them end quickly because the Asgardians do NOT let silly things like wars interfere with Spring Training, pre-season, Baseball Season, World Tree Series, or Draft season. 

And, at last, a society successfully uses sports as a means to peace. 

Loki can’t shake the feeling, somehow, that Thor has won. 

Thor can’t shake the same feeling about Loki. 

And Tony buys the Dodgers and moves them back to Brooklyn.

For reasons.


End file.
